Deadly ‘bullying’

It starts as a harmless game. One of the children in the class is singled out as a victim: they are teased, subjected to cutting jokes and mocked. But sometimes it ends in suicide or serious injury. In recent years, horrific stories of schoolchildren physically assaulting their classmates have repeatedly appeared in the Russian media. How can we translate ‘bullying’ (from the English ‘bully’ – a bully, a brawler, a pick-on-er) into Russian?

‘Travlya’ comes closest, but this term has not yet become part of school life in Russia – and it’s a shame. English teachers know full well what an act that seems innocent at first glance can lead to, such as this one… ‘You’ll never see your drawing again; you won’t show it to your mum and dad, or to your brother and sister. Don’t you dare show this letter to the teachers; I’m keeping an eye on you,” read the message found in the schoolbag of a girl in Year 4 (aged 8). A sheet of paper with a few lines written in uneven childish handwriting lay where she had very recently placed her drawing with great care.

Lesson after lesson, her art project took shape, and it turned out brilliantly. The girl was praised for having the best drawing in the class, and she was looking forward to showing it to her parents and her brother and sister. But someone decided to have a bit of fun. A game? That’s probably what my former teachers would have thought. Who took such things seriously? However, the British take bullying very seriously, as it is inextricably linked to the concept of ‘school’. They are seen as antagonists: bullying and school are incompatible. It is a law, an indisputable rule, and this idea is drummed into pupils’ minds at every opportunity.

No, teachers do not regard every scuffle as bullying. For boys, for example, light scuffles are quite natural, and whilst no one encourages physical violence, they are quite tolerant of the hyperactivity of young men. Something else is far worse. Psychological bullying is far more dangerous, when more and more participants get involved, making the child’s life unbearable.

The girl who found a threatening letter in her schoolbag was prepared for such a scenario and did the right thing. She told her teacher everything. The response was immediate. This incident became the main topic of the next whole-school assembly. The first thing the teacher did was to praise the girl for doing the right thing.

Yes, this sets an example for everyone – teachers really do solve their pupils’ problems, and this has nothing to do with snitching or tattling. Such behaviour is worthy of an adult’s wisdom and deserves praise. The little pupil’s ‘house’ receives 20 house points. Remember Harry Potter? ‘20 points to Gryffindor!’ Just like in that much-loved children’s story, all the pupils at the school are divided into four ‘houses’, and everyone strives to earn bonus points. This can be done by completing their homework better than anyone else or by achieving a brilliant result in a test.

‘House points’ are awarded for excellent behaviour and sporting victories. 20 hp is a lot. It’s a fitting reward for good behaviour. This was followed by a short talk on bullying at the assembly. The main message: bullying is unacceptable! And the school management will never tolerate it – even to the point of expulsion. This is taught from the earliest years. And what about the young ‘offender’? He was asked to confess. Yes, it’s complicated, it’s difficult and embarrassing, but it will be a courageous act by a noble person. The emphasis is placed precisely on this. Not on the fact that ‘then nothing will happen to you’, but rather that ‘you’ll be able to respect yourself for doing the right thing’.

For a long time, I couldn’t understand what it was about the local schoolchildren—especially the older ones—that so endeared them to me. They genuinely love ‘doing the right thing’, because they respect themselves first and foremost. Yes, they respect themselves by doing the right thing. This is the very foundation of respect for those around them. And then it comes naturally to hold the door open for an adult, a female classmate, or a young child. How many times have I stood still at the door of a café, with a senior school pupil holding it open for me? How many times have I quietly watched the pupils playing and joking around? I am genuinely happy for these children, free from extreme manifestations of hatred and malice, capable of genuine joy and empathy, who remain children until they finish school, yet are capable of performing noble deeds in a mature way.

Maksim Okulov